Laughter in the Time of Isolation

Time To Get Your Turkey On Can you believe it's almost the holidays? I can, this has been the longest year I've ever lived through! 2020 - the year Karma took a dump on the world. Last December 31st when I feel asleep at the stroke of 10:00 little did I expect what the new year had in store for us mere mortals. I saw a social media post the other day that made me stop and think (I know you're not used to that activity from me), it said: "When you feel lower than a snakes belly in a wagon rut, stop to think about Anne Frank. She was in hiding in a small attic for 2 years, constantly in fear of being discovered by the Nazi's." Her story ended tragically and still makes me emotional. Well damn, what am I complaining about? Being in isolation with plenty of food, toilet paper and the internet doesn't seem so tough does it? I can even scream without worrying about being sent to a death camp. However, the neighbors could send me to the asylum. Anyway this starte...

 Hacked By My Best Friend So I step away from the house to go buy dog food and while I'm gone my dog hijacks my computer. I punished her with a serious talking to and two weeks with no Animal Planet on television. It is true that after 6 months in isolation, I screamed when I stepped on the scale. It's not true that my crap stinks. I can't believe she told you that after all the times I have had to hold my breath and pick up her poop two or three times a day. I was in shock after weighing myself. One of you guys told me that calories don't count when no one sees you eating them. BTW, that is so not true, "You Were Lying Like a No-legged dog." I was cooking comfort food that your grandma would be proud of, chicken pot pie with biscuits, stuffed peppers, country fried steak, Italian sausages. I made bacon, pancakes and eggs for breakfast. I told myself that I had some very good reasons for my food choices. 1.) No one had to look at me. 2.) Blanka doesn't car...